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17 February, 2019

BOYS MENTORING ADVOCACY NETWORK SET TO LAUNCH "KITH AND KIN" MENTORING PROGRAM


CONTACT: 

Mr. Ola Akinwe
Founder, Boys Mentoring Advocacy Network (www.bmanadvocacy.org)
Nigeria Coordinator – International Men’s Day
Nigeria Coordinator – World Day Of The Boy Child Nigeria
Executive- Fathers and Families Coalition of America (FFCA)
Affiliate Member- Mengage Ltd, UK
Telephone: +234 802 301 0608 +234 815 500 2255
E-Mail: olaakinwe@bmanadvocacy.org

 “A mentor is someone you look up to because you can see everything you want to be shining out through their eyes” 


          LAGOS, NIGERIA  - Boys Mentoring Advocacy Network ("BMAN") is pioneering a community mentoring initiative --  “Kith And Kin”. This initiative creates mentoring programs that consider both the community and culture are developed in collaboration with community members and build on strengths within the community. The mentoring relationship will include not only the mentor and the young person, but also his or her family and the community to ensure success.

          The “Kith And Kin” mentoring programs will help to groom and connect youth and mentors to the tribal culture to which they belong by helping them to learn about their native community and family; encouraging an appreciation for Elders and traditional teachers, grandparents and parents; and including Native history, language and culture in the program.

         Elders and traditional teachers are able to share cultural traditions and values with younger generations to build a sense of personal and societal identity. An additional benefit of the "Kith And Kin" mentoring programs is that young people are taught the importance of community stewardship and the ways of the land.

          BMAN is seeking kinsmen/kinswomen who will volunteer to mentor four kindred in their family, tribe and clan or in their community.

          Individuals, communities, organizations, and institutions interested in participating in and raising awareness for the "Kith And Kin" mentoring programs should contact Mr. Ola Akinwe  by sending an e-mail to: olaakinwe@bmanadvocacy.org or by calling: +234 802 301 0608, +234 815 500 5522.

2019 WORLD DAY OF THE BOY CHILD: PROTECTING OUR BOYS . . . RECLAIMING OUR HERITAGE


CONTACT:

Africa Group Co-Coordinator – International Men’s Day 
Matthew Gansallo – Nigeria
E-Mail: mgansallo@yahoo.com

Caribbean Group Coordinator – International Men’s Day 
Michael Stewart E-Mail: michaelatstewarttlc@gmail.com

GHANA 
Ama Nsroma Larbie
Coordinator – World Day Of The Boy
Child Coordinator – International Men’s Day
E-mail: hello@theworthymenafrica.com

INDIA 
Jangam Veera Sasidhar
Coordinator – World Day of The Boy Child
E-Mail: sasi.saphr@gmail.com

INDONESIA
Joe Hanney
Coordinator – World Day of The Boy Child
Coordinator – International Men’s Day
E-Mail: joehanney@me.com

KENYA
Pastor Paul Muhami
Coordinator – World Day Of The Boy Child
Coordinator – International Men’s Day
E-mail: paulmuhami@gmail.com

Faith Nashipae
E-mail: fnashipae@thrivingfamilies.co.ke

LEBANON 
Liliane Andraos
Coordinator – World Day Of The Boy Child
E-Mail: liliane.andraos@gmail.com

NIGERIA 
Ola Akinwe
Coordinator – World Day Of The Boy Child
Coordinator – International Men’s Day
E-mail: bmanadvocacy@gmail.com

Jerry Eghomwanre
E-mail: osifo.jerry@yahoo.com

Eloviano Afakpe
E-Mail: eloviainitiative@gmail.com

SOUTH AFRICA 
Ditaba David Mphuthi, Ph.D
E-Mail: mphutdd@unisa.ac,za
Professor Thuledi Makua
E-mail: makuatp@unisa.ac.za

TRINIDAD AND TOBAGO
Jerome Teelucksingh, Ph.D.
Founder, International Men’s Day
E-Mail: j_teelucksingh@yahoo.com

Donald Berment
E-Mail: donaldberment@gmail.com

Ray M. S. Brathwaite
E-Mail: rmsbrath@yahoo.com

Dr. Robert Lee Moultrie
E-Mail: encouraging3000@gmail.com

Gabrielle Grant
E-Mail: ggrant91@hotmail.com

Wendell Grant
E-Mail: wendell.grant@gmail.com

Brian Bradshaw
E-Mail: generalrockjaw46@yahoo.com

Alvin Doris
E-Mail: alvindoris@yahoo.com

UGANDA 
Jane Nampija
Coordinator - World Day Of The Boy Child
E-Mail: jnampija@mfadv.org

UNITED STATES 
Diane Aisha Sears
Coordinator – International Men’s Day
Coordinator - World Day Of The Boy Child
E-Mail: insearchoffatherhood@gmail.com

ZIMBABWE 
Kenneth Maregere
 Coordinator – International Men’s Day
Coordinator – World Day Of The Boy Child
E- Mail: kenniemargere@gmail.com




          


          LAGOS, NIGERIA –  Institutions, organizations, and individuals throughout our global village will observe “World Day Of The Boy Child” on 16 May 2019 under the theme, “Protecting Our Boys . . . Reclaiming Our Heritage”. Of the 7.6 billion souls with whom we share Planet Earth, 3,874,259,756 are males and 1,004,638,305 of these souls are under the age of 15. Boys are more than mere extensions of ourselves. These souls represent our heritage and serve as one of the links to the past and the present that intersects with the future of our families, our communities, and our world. Created under the International Men’s Day umbrella, “World Day Of The Boy Child” was inaugurated in 2018 by Gender Issues Thought Leader, humanitarian, faculty member in the History Department at the University of West Indies, prolific author, and International Men’s Day Founder Jerome Teelucksingh, Ph.D.


          The 1,004,638,305 souls who are males under the age of 15 – boys – emerged from the womb with irrepressible enthusiasm, insatiable curiosity, a natural and spontaneous reaction to disappointment, rejection, failure, and spiritual, physical, psychological, and emotional pain, and a pristine view of the world. They are fragile and vulnerable. Somewhere along the journey from boyhood to manhood, boys are socialized not to express the natural and spontaneous reactions to spiritual, physical, emotional, and psychological pain, disappointment, and rejection. They are socialized to equate strength and masculinity with suppressing their natural and spontaneous reaction to pain, disappointment, and rejection; not asking for help; and shunning vulnerability. In actuality, vulnerability is about strength – it is about standing in front of another soul spiritually, psychologically, and emotionally naked. Many of these 1,004,638,305 souls are suicidal, slowly descending into the deep dark abyss of depression, and consumed by low self-esteem and repressed emotions. 


          According to the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development, an organization based in Paris, France which administers the triennial Programme for International Student Assessment (“PISA”) which examines the proficiency of 15 year olds -- in over 90 nations -- in reading, reading comprehension, science, mathematics, writing, and writing comprehension, boys throughout our global village are academically underperforming their female counterparts.  The PISA scores for girls are much higher than those of boys in reading, reading comprehension, and writing comprehension. Boys find it difficult to navigate a literacy-based curriculum. Educators and school administrators equate boys’ difficulty or inability to read with their level of intelligence, label them as either “intellectually challenged” or “unteachable”, and arbitrarily ship them off to special education classes. The majority of these boys are brilliant. Rather than investigating why boys have difficulty developing reading and reading comprehension skills or making adjustments in the curriculum – adjustments which would include infusing the curriculum with reading material that interests boys and captivate their attention -- boys are allowed to read several grades below their current grade level. Eventually, they lose interest in school and drop out. Unless an individual, organization, or institution intervenes, these souls will mature into uneducated, unemployable, and unskilled adults who will find it difficult to resist the pull of gravity of illegitimate economic opportunities and the fast track to prison. 


          At least 3,000,000,000 souls are living on less than US$2.50 each day and approximately 1,000,000,000 children are living in poverty – many of whom are boys. Boys born into impoverished families are unable to attend school because the cost of textbooks and school supplies exceed the family’s monthly or annual income. The International Labour Organization which is headquartered in Geneva, Switzerland estimates that approximately 1,199,400,000 children are engaged in child labor. It further estimates that 786,600,000 of the 1,199,400,000 young souls engaged in child labor are boys. There are between approximately 300,000 to 500,000 child soldiers – children as young as 7 years old – who are recruited to serve in armed militias – children who are witness to and participants in atrocious acts of brutality and deadly violence. Approximately 60% of the souls forced to serve as child soldiers are boys. The United Nations’ most recent “Children And Armed Conflict Report” monitored the violation of children’s rights in 20 nations that are engulfed in bloody conflicts. These nations employ the services of children as solders, suicide bombers, spies, and messengers. Verified cases of recruitment and employment of children as soldiers in nations which include, but are not limited to, Yemen, the Syrian Arab Republic, South Sudan, Nigeria, Somalia, the Central African Republic, and the Democratic Republic of the Congo appear in the report. Since 2017, the United Nations International Children’s Emergency Fund has helped more than 8,700 children – many of whom are boys -- who served as child soldiers and were released from armed groups that engaged their services to reintegrate into civilian life and find and reunite with their families. 

            "World Day Of The Boy Child” serves as a platform for individuals, organizations, and institutions to improve the manner in which we protect our boys and reclaim our heritage.

          How? 

          Global and Regional Coordinators for “World Day Of The Boy Child” are offering a few suggestions: 


• Rewrite the narrative on strength and masculinity by equating strength with vulnerability.


 • Facilitate and moderate Global and National Town Halls which serve as venues for boys and adolescent males to engage in a “straight-no chaser dialogue” to express to key stakeholders what they need and want to safely and successfully navigate the arduous journey from boyhood to manhood. The key stakeholders with whom boys and adolescent young males would engage in discussions include educators, school administrators, law enforcement professionals, legal professionals, health care professionals and providers, social services professionals and providers, parents, legislators, business leaders, and Fatherhood and Men’s Issues advocates and practitioners. Global and National Town Hall Meetings would also serve as a venue for boys and adolescent males to co-design and co-monitor -- with key stakeholders -- initiatives that provide them with the resources and tools they need to successfully and safely navigate their journey from boyhood to manhood. 


• Identify and support existing initiatives which have a successful track record of addressing and helping to eradicate the (A) academic underperformance of boys and adolescent males and their mischaracterization as being “unteachable”, “intellectually challenged”, and “behavior problems”; (B) rising incidence of depression and suicide among boys and adolescent males; (C) recruitment and utilization of boys and adolescent males as child soldiers; (D) underlying causes of poverty which lead to boys and adolescent males working full-time to support their families and not attending school; (E) literacy gap for boys and adolescent males; (F) lack of legitimate real-life options; and (G) lack of positive male role models. 


• Employ male educators and administrators in schools located in communities that have Fatherless households or households devoid of a dominant male presence. 


• Design and implement “male-inclusive” curricula in Grades K-12 – by introducing reading material that captures the interest of boys and adolescent males. Primary schools and high schools would be required to provide its male student population from ages 5 through 17 with textbooks and classroom and reading materials that are action and science-oriented and informational.


 • Design and implement a “No Boy Left Behind Literacy Initiative” which results in every boy reading at least one grade level above his current grade. 


• Offset the repressed anger of boys and adolescent males which is a by-product of their current socialization with the design of mandatory anger management and conflicts resolution training. All primary schools and high schools would be required to include and implement mandatory anger management and conflicts resolution training in their curricula. As a result, boys in the 5 through 17 age group in every school can be provided with essential emotional, psychological, and decision-making tools that will help them safely and successfully navigate the arduous journey from boyhood to manhood. 


          For further information about “World Day Of The Boy Child” and how you can participate, please contact one of the Coordinators listed above. 


02 February, 2019

BOYS MENTORING ADVOCACY NETWORK TO LAUNCH INITIATIVE FOR NIGERIA'S IMPOVERISHED CHILDREN UNDER THE INTERNATIONAL MEN'S DAY UMBRELLA

CONTACT: 

NIGERIA 

Mr. Ola Akinwe
Founder, Boys Mentoring Advocacy Network
(www.bmanadvocacy.org)
 Nigeria Coordinator – International Men’s Day
Nigeria Coordinator – World Day Of The Boy Child
Nigeria Executive- Fathers and Families Coalition of America (FFCA)
Affiliate Member- Mengage Ltd, UK
Telephone: +234 802 301 0608; +234 815 500 2255
E-Mail: olaakinwe@bmanadvocacy.org



[PHOTOGRAPH COURTESY OF THE GUARDIAN NIGERIAN AND EXTRACTED FROM WEBSITE OF INTERNATIONAL CENTRE FOR INVESTIGATIVE WORK (WWW.ICIRNIGERIA.ORG)]


          LAGOS, NIGERIA -- Out of the 7.6 billion souls who occupy Planet Earth, 198,865,000 of these souls reside in Nigeria on the African Continent. Although it is the one of the world’s leading exporters of oil -- its primary source of revenue -- Nigeria spends its revenue mostly on importing among other things, food and gasoline. At the end of 2018, at least approximately 90,856,838 Nigerians were living in extreme poverty, that is, living on less than US$1.25 each day. Approximately 87,500,952 in Nigeria souls are children under the age of 15. An overwhelming number of these 87,500,952 souls have been born into families that barely have access to the necessities other souls in the world take for granted such as food and clothing. Many of Nigeria’s children lack adequate access to clothing, shoes, toys and essential tools they will need for school such as composition books, pens, pencils, paper, and textbooks. This is a scenario that the Boys Mentoring Advocacy Network (“BMAN”) (www.bmanadvocacy.org) under the leadership of its Founder, Mr. Ola Akinwe, is preparing to change with the proposed launch of the “Nigeria Children’s Initiative”.

          Through its “Nigeria Children’s Initiative”, BMAN plans to provide impoverished Nigerian children with clothes, shoes, composition books, pens, pencils, toys, paper, age appropriate children’s books, and textbooks. BMAN has garnered global support for the “Nigeria Children’s Initiative” which takes the form of a partnership with the United States International Men’s Day Team (http://www.usainternationalmensday.blogspot.com) under the International Men’s Day umbrella. The United States International Men’s Day Team will assist BMAN in identifying and introducing it to prospective American donors of clothing, shoes, toys, age-appropriate literature, school supplies, toys, and textbooks. Nigeria is among 86 nations that observes International Men’s Day which celebrates and honors the contributions and sacrifices that Men make to families, communities, and society on 19 November of each year. Inaugurated in 1999 by Jerome Teeluckskingh, Ph.D. in Trinidad and Tobago, International Men’s Day shares a 48-hour partnership with Universal Children Day’ which is observed on 20 November of each year and is endorsed by the United Nations.

          For further information concerning BMAN’s “Nigeria Children’s Initiative”, contact Mr Ola Akinwe by either sending an e-mail to: olaakinwe@bmanadvocacy.org or by calling Mr. Akinwe at +234 802 301 0608 or +234 815 500 2255.

          To learn more about BMAN’s mission, visit its website at www.bmanadvocacy.org.

30 January, 2019

WE ARE ALL ARTISTS: GLENVILLE ASHBY, Ph.D.

           


          What if every morning when you awaken, you envision the new day that greets you as a blank canvas?  What if, in the first waking moments of each new day, you envision yourself as an Artist?  The truth of the matter is that we are all Artists.   We transform the vast space of our blank canvas – each new day --  into an intricately hued and complicatedly designed collage with our thoughts . . . words . . . actions . . . inactions . . . intentions . . .  happiness . . . disappointments . . . . triumphs . . . interactions with other souls . . . mindfulness . . .  and mindlessness.




            Artists look at the world and see beauty, magic, and possibilities.

In the first waking moments of each new day, Artists ask: “What will I create today?”


  
         How different would your Life be if you looked at each new day as a blank canvas?   Would you make different decisions?   Would it move you to become completely aligned with your purpose?   Would you have a better life and be more successful?   




When you awaken tomorrow morning and look at your new day – your blank canvas -- will you ask:  “What will I create today?”

___________
Glenville Ashby, Ph.D. is one of the Millennium’s leading Spiritual Masters, Qigong Sifu, Spiritual Teacher, Life Coach, Wellness Consultant and the award-winning author of Anam Cara: Your Bridge to Enlightenment and Creativity (www.amazon.com; www.barnesandnoble.com); In Search Of Truth:  A Course In Spiritual Psychology – Selected Writings 2013-2018 (www.amazon.com; www.barnesandnoble.com); and The  Mystical QiGong Handbook For Good Health (www.amazon.com; barnesandnoble.com). 





USA INTERNATIONAL MEN'S DAY TEAM SUPPORTS WORLD INTERFAITH HARMONY WEEK'S 1-7 FEBRUARY 2019 OBSERVANCE




            At the Plenary Session of the United Nations’ 65th General Assembly in New York on 23 September 2010, His Majesty Abdullah II bin Al-Hussain, King of the Nation of Jordan and the 43rd direct descendant of the Prophet Muhammad, unveiled his vision for interfaith collaboration and world peace.  In a speech he delivered at the 65th General Assembly of the United Nations, King Abdullah introduced World Interfaith Harmony Week.   On 20 October 2010, World Interfaith Harmony Week was proclaimed by the United Nations’ General Assembly in United Nations Resolution A/RES/65/5.   In 2019, World Interfaith Harmony Week will be observed globally by institutions, organizations, and individuals under the theme – assigned by the United Nations -- “Sustainable Development Through Interfaith Harmony” – commencing on Friday, 1 February 2019 and concluding on Thursday, 7 February 2019.  




           To herald the forthcoming observance of 2019 World Interfaith Harmony Week, the United Nations recently issued a statement (http://www.un.org/en/events/interfaithharmony week/), an excerpt of which appears below:




“ . . . At the core of all the faith systems and traditions is the recognition that we are all in this together and that we need to love and support one another to live in harmony and peace in an environmentally sustainable world.  Our world continues to be beset by conflict and intolerance with rising number of refugees and the internally displaced in a hostile and unwelcoming world around them. We are also unfortunately witnessing messages of hate spreading discord among people. The need for spiritual guidance has never been greater. It is imperative that we double our efforts to spread the message of good neighborliness based on common humanity, a message shared by all faith traditions . . . “




           The United States International Men’s Day Team endorses 2019 World Interfaith Harmony Week and will, throughout Calendar Year 2019, collaborate with organizations, individuals, and institutions to create and promote sustainable development and interfaith harmony.  It is our view that churches, mosques, synagogues, and temples have always been – and continue to be the – the center of the Universe of communities throughout our global village.   The Interfaith Community has not only attended to the spiritual needs of their congregations and the communities surrounding them – but also have addressed – and continue to address – poverty, hunger, homelessness, ethnic and religious intolerance, and social injustice.  Additionally, the theme for 2019 World Interfaith Harmony Week“Sustainable Development through Interfaith Harmony” is in alignment with the “United Nations 2030 Agenda for Sustainable Development” which seeks to, among other things, strengthen peace through a Plan of Action – an agenda which the United States International Men’s Day Team supports.  The Plan of Action was adopted on 25 September 2015 at the United Nations Sustainable Development Summit (United Nations Resolution A/RES/70/1).  The United Nations 2030 Agenda for Sustainable Development (https://sustainabledevelopment.un.org/post2015/transformingourworld)  identifies 17 Sustainable Development Goals which will serve to eradicate many of the key challenges which marginalize Men and Boys and the communities in which they reside:


·         Goal 1:  End poverty in all its forms everywhere.

·         Goal 2. End hunger, achieve food security and improved nutrition and promote sustainable agriculture

·         Goal 3. Ensure healthy lives and promote well-being for all at all ages

·         Goal 4. Ensure inclusive and equitable quality education and promote lifelong learning opportunities for all

·         Goal 5. Achieve gender equality and empower all women and girls

·         Goal 6. Ensure availability and sustainable management of water and sanitation for all

·         Goal 7. Ensure access to affordable, reliable, sustainable and modern energy for all

·         Goal 8. Promote sustained, inclusive and sustainable economic growth, full and productive employment and decent work for all

·         Goal 9. Build resilient infrastructure, promote inclusive and sustainable industrialization and foster innovation

·         Goal 10. Reduce inequality within and among countries

·         Goal 11. Make cities and human settlements inclusive, safe, resilient and sustainable

·         Goal 12. Ensure sustainable consumption and production patterns

·         Goal 13. Take urgent action to combat climate change and its impacts*

·         Goal 14. Conserve and sustainably use the oceans, seas and marine resources for sustainable development

·         Goal 15. Protect, restore and promote sustainable use of terrestrial ecosystems, sustainably manage forests, combat desertification, and halt and reverse land degradation and halt biodiversity loss

·         Goal 16. Promote peaceful and inclusive societies for sustainable development, provide access to justice for all and build effective, accountable and inclusive institutions at all levels

·         Goal 17. Strengthen the means of implementation and revitalize the global partnership for sustainable development 




18 January, 2019

LIFTING THE VEIL SHROUDING MALE DOMESTIC EMOTIONAL AND PHYSICAL ABUSE: DR. OLASENI MATTHEW GANSALLO, AFRICA GROUP INTERNATIONAL MEN'S DAY COORDINATOR




For the most part, men throughout our global village who have been on the receiving end of domestic emotional and physical abuse have been extremely reluctant to report it or seek help.  As a result, the incidence of male domestic emotional and physical abuse is underreported.  Why have many Men who are victims of domestic physical and emotional elected not to report it to authorities or seek help?   Fear of being stigmatized or that their story will not be believed by authorities. This fear is underscored by the fact that an overwhelming lack of support exists for male victims of domestic emotional and physical abuse.   In an online article published on 15 September 2018 by The BBC News (https://www.bbc.co.uk/news) entitled, “Male Domestic Abuse: Not Enough Support For Victims, Says Charity”, The Mankind Initiative (https://www.mankind.org/uk) which helps Men escape abuse, pointed out that while one-third of domestic abuse victims are male, only 0.8% of refuge beds were reserved for them.    Mr. Mark Brooks who serves as spokesperson for The Mankind Initiative stated:

“While more victims are beginning to come forward, a failure to ensure a basic level of support across the country will fail those men and, of course, fail their children where  they are involved.”

According to the organization which is calling for dedicated support for male victims of domestic physical and emotional abuse, pointed out that these souls must travel more than 150 miles away from their home to get the help and support they need.

          The plight of men who are victims of domestic emotional and physical abuse has not gone unnoticed by Men’s Issues Thought Leader and Africa Group Coordinator for International Men’s Day (http://www.usainternationalmensday.blgospot.com) by Dr. Olaseni Matthew Gansallo.  Dr. Gansallo, who serves as the Director of the highly acclaimed Young Graduates for Museums and Galleries at the British Museum in London in the United Kingdom, has lifted the veil shrouding domestic male abuse with the release of his groundbreaking literary work, "Men Who Suffer Emotional Abuse:  The Silent Suffering – A Guide To Help”  Dr. Gansallo arranged for his empowering book to be released on 19 November 2018 – International Men’s Day – a day observed by 86 nations that celebrates the contributions and sacrifices that Men make to families, communities, and society and inaugurated in November 1999 by Gender Issues Thought Leader, educator, and author Jerome Teelucksingh, Ph.D. in Trinidad and Tobago has moved male domestic abuse – and male emotional abuse, in particular, into the Global Men’s Issues Dialogue.  

How are men reacting to “Men Who Suffer Emotional Abuse:  The Silent Suffering – A Guide To Help”?  Dr. Gansallo who performed research and interviewed over 600 Men mostly in Britain and Nigeria who were victims of domestic emotional abuse over a three-year period had this to say:

 "Generally Men find it difficult to talk about emotions and from recent feedback, this book seems to have connected with many Men and Boys."

            Dr. Gansallo finds that his e-mail inbox is being flooded with feedback from readers of his empowering book as evidenced by an e-mail he received on 12 January 2019:

“Dear Matthew,

Hello from Margaret & David, your flight companions from London to Dubai on 3rd December 2018.

Hope you had a lovely Christmas with your family and may we wish you and yours a Happy, Healthy and Successful 2019.

I have taking the time to read your book you so kindly gave to us, (hope you didn’t get into trouble with your publishers), and I have found it enlightening, troubling and uncannily helpful regarding my own marital history.

How did you know, did you have an inclination that I might be one of those to whom you wrote your book? Whatever the reason you cannot realise how helpful it has been.

I served in the Royal Navy and in 1975 I discovered, by a “Dear John” that my then wife had gone off with a mess deck colleague and taking my three boys with them. After the divorce in 1976 I was given ‘reasonable’ access, whatever that means, so easily manipulated.

I was told that the middle boy was wetting the bed when returning from being with me, their schooling was being affected, they were being bullied because the other kids were saying ‘why is your step dad’s surname different from yours?’ How would they know? The final straw was that I received a A3 deed poll document allowing the legal changing of their surname to the one I was cuckolded by and of course I consented because I believed, (wrongly as it happened), that the boys were being harmed.  Letters and birthday cards with money were never acknowledged and then they changed address without letting me know.

All this time I was serving at sea and ashore, I met a 19 year old girl and married her against a lot of advise not to, I was 34 at the time.  I know now that I was trying to restore my life to when I married my first wife. Within the space of a year she was off with an American sailor and even went to Denmark where his ship was next visiting. I got a letter from her with a very cryptic few words, “I think I have made a mistake”.  I foolishly took her back  and you can guess the rest, we were divorced within a year after she just couldn’t keep from straying and using my money to do it.

I met Margaret in 1980, she had also been through a very acrimonious divorce in 1977, although we were attracted to each other we were very very wary and didn’t marry until 1985.

I met up with my two eldest boys after 36 years, by now grown men and very successful, that was a relief because I was so concerned  that what their mother had done would have harmed them. The eldest is estranged from his Mother and the second eldest sees her very occasionally. The youngest was too young to really remember me although he has also been successful.

Regarding your book, the third and last paragraph on page 76 and paragraphs 1,2 and 5 on page 77 are particularly poignant and revealing and have helped me come to terms with my history, far more than before I read your book.

So, thank you Matthew, and if you have got this far with my emotional bullying saga, thank you also for taking the time, I sure you are a busy man.

I have found the writing of this email a very cathartic experience.

My very best wishes”


          To purchase your copy of “Men Who Suffer Emotional Abuse:  The Silent Suffering – A Guide to Help” contact the publisher, by sending an e-mail to: flointersch@gmail.com.

            To learn more about Dr. Gansallo’s groundbreaking work on Men’s Issues and domestic male emotional abuse, send an e-mail to:  mgansallo@yahoo.com.

BOYS MENTORING ADVOCACY NETWORK SET TO LAUNCH "KITH AND KIN" MENTORING PROGRAM

CONTACT:  Mr. Ola Akinwe Founder, Boys Mentoring Advocacy Network (www.bmanadvocacy.org) Nigeria Coordinator – International Men’s Da...